Personally I’ve always liked a good fish story. You know what that is, don’t you? It’s a story that’s so obvious a lie that it’s told not to fool anyone but to entertain. It’s the barroom tale in Crocodile Dundee where he talks about catching a fish so big that when they cut it open, they found “four Philipino fishermen… still in their boat”.
But essential to the bon-vivre nature of the fish story is that you have to enjoy telling it. The politicians who get that always seem to do exceptionally well. George W. Bush, at the very least, owes much of his first election to his affable nature, and but for term limits, former Mayor Ed Koch might still be running New York City thanks to his. Politicians and their major media enablers all need to understand that the general public isn’t nearly as stupid as they think we are. We know we’re being lied to, but if it’s being done with style, then it goes down a little smoother.
Take this Gem from the classic 1982 movie “The Best Little Whore House in Texas”. Dolly Parton and Burt Reynolds played the leading roles, but it was Charles Durning in a supporting role as the governor of Texas who was the scene-stealer. (BTW if you think this looks effeminate, remember that the guy prancing around is also a man who survived the assault on Omaha beach, and during his time in Europe with the Third Infantry was awarded a Silver Star, a Bronze Star, and three purple hearts.)
Anyway, presentation counts, and Governor Corzine doesn’t seem to get the light hearted essentials of lying for a living. I mean look at this guy:
And that’s a posed picture, not me trolling around to find something to make him look bad. Does he look like the kind of guy you’d like to yuk it up with?
He needs to understand that we all know about his relationship with Carla Katz, the head of the largest of the civil service unions, and the “loans” he extended to her before his election. We know about his scofflaw traffic accident, and we know that so far he has inherited far more problems than he has caused.
We know he’s dealing with one of the most corrupt state governments in the history of the country, and that virtually everyone he speaks to on a day to day basis, will probably be indicted once the federal prosecutors can get to their name in the alphabetical list of government staffers. (That's a joke of course... if it were true... then everyone in government wound be busy changing their name to Zyzzw Zzzzyz or some such.) But if he would just spin it a little better I think we’d all feel better about it, including him.
His big news now is that he’s proposing an new “anti-crime” initiative, but thanks to the corruption, the double office holding of our elected officials, the breathtakingly large unfunded pension liability, the massive new state funded loan program to promote fetal stem cell research by less than cutting edge companies, the stalled highway privatization, the unreformed “Abbot school districts” where they steal as much as they spend, and the rolling disaster that is NJ’s “property tax” reform, there is no new money for any of his proposals.
As for the substance, of his initiative, it’s all the same “catch and release”, “blame the gun not the shooter”, root causes nonsense that we’ve been hearing from liberal Democrats since the 60’s, but what did you expect? It’s never helped in the past and it isn’t going to make a dent in the crime problem now. But that won’t stop some government paid “blue ribbon panel” come election time, from determining that thanks to the changes, on Tuesday evenings between 1:30AM and 1:45 AM, there has been a 11% reduction in violent crimes against one legged, transgender dwarves, within three blocks of the state capital.
Personally I wait with baited breath, the announcement of the surprisingly positive results. In the meantime I suppose I’m going to be lied to some more. And the truth is, I don’t really expect NJ politicians to become honest and responsible. Like the Chinese say, “All crows under heaven are Black”. I just wish they would manage it with a little more style, that’s all.