- The Enemy Camp

The dirty little secret of my family is that I'm actually the black sheep. Every choice I've ever made, every direction I've chosen, every relationship I've pursued and every friend I've made over the last 40 years has all been over the direct objection (and deep shame) of either one or both of my parents. Mom wanted me to work for the post office (or somewhere else equally safe and secure), and dad wanted me to be a soldier, and eventually president. Readers of this blog know that I've managed to let them both down.

I tell you this because until quite recently I had a secret plan that I was waiting to hatch which might have restored me in the eyes of my father, but I never actually got a chance to pull it off. The best man at my wedding was my buddy Matt who attended Georgetown Law School. And whenever I went down there to visit him I'd keep my eye open for senator Ted Kennedy. My thinking was that if I ran into the senator from Massachusetts, I could restore my father's opinion of me if I just hauled off and slugged him right in the nose.

I'd be brought up on charges of course, but it would be a small price to pay to restore my father's much degraded opinion of me. Unfortunately Ted Kennedy died before I ever got my chance, but it didn't really matter. The truth is, I stopped caring what my dad thinks of my life ages ago anyway... so Ted probably would have gotten off without a beating after all.

I don't know what my dad thinks of Chris Matthews. So if I ever run into him down in DC, any physical abuse he gets will have to be delivered purely for the pleasure of it. But thanks to comments like this one, I think that will be justification enough.