Thursday, June 22, 2017

- The Eichenwald Way

Personally, I'm a pretty plain vanilla guy when it comes to those private moments. I'm a heterosexual man which means, for those younger readers who have probably never heard of such a thing, I'm a man who is physically attracted to women. Though 'women' is probably overstating it because I generally prefer to be with them only one woman at a time.

I also prefer them 'age appropriate', because I've found that you do have to occasionally talk to women. If a woman's reaction to me saying "What you talkin bout Willis?" is to say in a totally deadpan voice, "Who's Willis?", there is going to be an inevitable communications gap.

About the 'weirdest' thing in my romantic life at the moment, to the eyes of someone in the same position as me 50+ years ago, is that my girlfriend is Asian and I'm not.

I didn't pick her because she was Asian, I picked her because she's smart, and charming, and very good looking. Her fashion sense and how she looks in high heels had more to do with her appeal than her skin color. And although she looks a little different than I do and is a substantial number of years younger, she was born in Oregon, so there is a very small cultural gap.

All this means that while I'm unusual in many ways, my sexual preferences aren't one of them. I don't begrudge anyone their own proclivities so long as they involve consenting adults. I just think that sort of thing should be kept private. In the age of public weirdness and aesthetic as a political identity, "Do what you like, but leave me out of it" has become my motto.

But all this 'normalcy' makes me strange in a different way, in that, strangeness still seems strange to me.

These days we're supposed to applaud people for their strangeness, but I have a problem with that. If you're only sexually attracted to amputees, or get turned on by dressing up as a stuffed Teddy bear and being spanked with food products, I have a very hard time relating to you. And I can't help but think that having a proclivity as odd as those makes your mental processes very different from mine. In effect, it makes me wonder about your character in other areas.

Which is why I keep coming back to second rate columnist and serial public forum liar Kurt Eichenwald. I can't help but think that his character is warped in some way, at least when compared to mine. I don't care about him per se. It's just that the world we live in gives a guy who does his job a great deal of influence in directing our culture. And the direction of more 'tentacle porn' for 21st century America, doesn't seem to me the direction we all want to go.

Luckily for us all, Mr. Eichenwald is also pretty careless. So instead of quietly propagandizing a more 'tentacle friendly' lifestyle choice in the pages of Newsweek, he's stepped on a landmine by letting the 4chan guys find out about his weirdness. They have continued their non-stop ridicule of the man and his habits, to the entertainment of us all.


bobby said...

I can't understand why the left hasn't climbed all over this.

Tentacle porn is essentially fantasy rape porn.

I thought rape was bad?

Tom said...

'Rapey' = exciting, 'Rape' = bad. If you are who I think you are bobby, no one knows this better than you. For me, the probable smell of tentacle porn is more than enough to discourage me.

The thing I think is funniest about this issue is that the more hard left the Feminist is, the more depraved she is sexually. I've um... tested this assertion, and I think it's 100% correlated. The most Feminist women I've ever been with have been, by far, the ones who crave the most severe treatment in the sack. Since I feel fairly empowered in the rest of my life, I don't feel the need to be cruelly dominant during sex - at least no more than the typical guy with a normal level of testosterone. Kurt Eichenwald apparently doesn't share this view. It's my view that only the weakest men who feel overpowered by women feel the need for the most extreme (and foul smelling) rape porn fantasies. THAT describes Mr. Eichenwald to a T if you ask me.